Parshas Beshalach

To read this week's drasha please click here.

Parshas Shmos

There is very little that can surprise us in the news.  News stations compete with Hollywood films and programs for our attention, and choose to display the most fantastical and unbelievable stories and images on our screens and pages.  And we are used to it.  Nevertheless, recently, the news has been really hard to believe, particularly, stories of hate, in our community and in Israel.  These are the kinds of stories that I can believe in a history book, but are extremely hard to accept that they are occurring now, in our community.  I refer, in particular, to the attacks on the local shuls as well as to the conflicts in Beit Shemesh in Israel.

How do we respond?  Aside from the obvious – that we become much more careful about our own safety, I think that we need to step back and reflect on the nature of these events, the underlying causes for them, and try to eradicate the roots of these crimes from our own community.

There is an interesting midrash about the study of Torah:

תהלים פרק קכז פסוק ה

אַשְׁרֵי הַגֶּבֶר אֲשֶׁר מִלֵּא אֶת אַשְׁפָּתוֹ מֵהֶם לֹא יֵבֹשׁוּ כִּי יְדַבְּרוּ אֶת אוֹיְבִים בַּשָּׁעַר:

תלמוד בבלי מסכת קידושין דף ל:

מאי אֶת אוֹיְבִים בַּשָּׁעַר אמר רבי חייא בר אבא אפי' האב ובנו הרב ותלמידו שעוסקין בתורה בשער אחד נעשים אויבים זה את זה ואינם זזים משם עד שנעשים אוהבים זה את זה שנאמר (במדבר כא) את והב בסופה - אל תקרי בסוּפָה אלא בסוֹפָה

When two people study Torah together – even friends or relatives – become as enemies while they study.  Nevertheless, the  process eventually brings them closer to one another

What does this mean?  Why do we validate the possibility that joint Torah study can become a process of hatred?

I believe that the gemarah is highlighting a fundamental truth:  when you study Torah, you are searching for the truth; the One Truth.  The purpose of learning with a chavrusa is to share inevitably divergent views.  When multiple people formulate different views about what the one truth is; implicitly one person’s view invalidates the view of the other, which is, by definition, false.  Hatred and competition emerge, as each fears that the other holds the truth, and they, themselves, are fraudulent.

Nevertheless, the Talmud concludes, they each ultimately step back and become ohavim at the end, as they each recognize their own limitations.  They recognize the fact that much is unknown, and each should be respected and appreciated for their effort in helping each other come closer to their truth.  And even if their views are never reconciled, they respect each other’s civil right to disagree, and never allow themselves to be caught up in the machlokes aspect of the search for truth.

We find that Esav and Yaakov had a lifelong conflict and struggle, marked by hatred.  Aside from the lengthy midrashik descriptions of their conflict, their friction is clear in the text:

בראשית פרק כז

(מא) וַיִּשְׂטֹם עֵשָׂו אֶת יַעֲקֹב עַל הַבְּרָכָה אֲשֶׁר בֵּרֲכוֹ אָבִיו וַיֹּאמֶר עֵשָׂו בְּלִבּוֹ יִקְרְבוּ יְמֵי אֵבֶל אָבִי וְאַהַרְגָה אֶת יַעֲקֹב אָחִי:

Esav said to himself that he will kill Yaakov after the mourning period for their father ends.

Interestingly, their father, Yitzchak, had a brother, Yishmael, who had his own differences with Yaakov, but did not have a conflict or confrontation at all.   At worst, it was,

בראשית פרק כא

(ט) וַתֵּרֶא שָׂרָה אֶת בֶּן הָגָר הַמִּצְרִית אֲשֶׁר יָלְדָה לְאַבְרָהָם מְצַחֵק:

However interpreted, is not hatred.  Why the difference?

Yaakov and Esav were in competition, while Yitzchak was chosen before being born, and there never was a conflict:

בראשית פרק יז

(טו) וַיֹּאמֶר אֱלֹהִים אֶל אַבְרָהָם שָׂרַי אִשְׁתְּךָ לֹא תִקְרָא אֶת שְׁמָהּ שָׂרָי כִּי שָׂרָה שְׁמָהּ: (טז) וּבֵרַכְתִּי אֹתָהּ וְגַם נָתַתִּי מִמֶּנָּה לְךָ בֵּן וּבֵרַכְתִּיהָ וְהָיְתָה לְגוֹיִם מַלְכֵי עַמִּים מִמֶּנָּה יִהְיוּ: (יז) וַיִּפֹּל אַבְרָהָם עַל פָּנָיו וַיִּצְחָק וַיֹּאמֶר בְּלִבּוֹ הַלְּבֶן מֵאָה שָׁנָה יִוָּלֵד וְאִם שָׂרָה הֲבַת תִּשְׁעִים שָׁנָה תֵּלֵד: (יח) וַיֹּאמֶר אַבְרָהָם אֶל הָאֱלֹהִים לוּ יִשְׁמָעֵאל יִחְיֶה לְפָנֶיךָ: (יט) וַיֹּאמֶר אֱלֹהִים אֲבָל שָׂרָה אִשְׁתְּךָ יֹלֶדֶת לְךָ בֵּן וְקָרָאתָ אֶת שְׁמוֹ יִצְחָק וַהֲקִמֹתִי אֶת בְּרִיתִי אִתּוֹ לִבְרִית עוֹלָם לְזַרְעוֹ אַחֲרָיו: (כ) וּלְיִשְׁמָעֵאל שְׁמַעְתִּיךָ הִנֵּה בֵּרַכְתִּי אֹתוֹ וְהִפְרֵיתִי אֹתוֹ וְהִרְבֵּיתִי אֹתוֹ בִּמְאֹד מְאֹד שְׁנֵים עָשָׂר נְשִׂיאִם יוֹלִיד וּנְתַתִּיו לְגוֹי גָּדוֹל: (כא) וְאֶת בְּרִיתִי אָקִים אֶת יִצְחָק אֲשֶׁר תֵּלֵד לְךָ שָׂרָה לַמּוֹעֵד הַזֶּה בַּשָּׁנָה הָאַחֶרֶת:(כב) וַיְכַל לְדַבֵּר אִתּוֹ וַיַּעַל אֱלֹהִים מֵעַל אַבְרָהָם:

Even before Yitzchak was born, God told Avraham that Yishmael will be blessed and will carry a legacy, but that his son-to-be-born, Yitzchak will be the one to inherit the promise.

Yitzchak never competed with Yishmael because their destinies were laid out from the outset, leaving no room for competition.  But in the case of Yaakov and Esav, Yaakov, Esav, Yitzchak and Rivka all did not know who would emerge on top, and they spent their lives trying to figure that out and to control it, resulting in competition and hatred.

The same exact thing goes on in our word today.  Different religious views of what the one Truth is; the insecurity that someone else represents the possibility that you and your values are all worthless creates a tremendous competition, intolerance, and hatred for each other.  We look for ways to invalidate other views in order to validate ourselves, and increase our own self confidence.

One solution is to create a philosophy of moral relativism, where we assert that there is no Truth; truth is what works for each of us, and we each respect each other’s taste in religion like we tolerate people taste in clothing.  In many ways this is effective, as many people in the United Stated view it this way, and most do not hold pogroms or vandalize and attack houses of worship.

However, I believe that this approach unnecessarily and inappropriately dilutes the meaning of religion  I do believe that religion can attempt to discover The Truth.  Nevertheless, we can still respect each other as people and respect each other’s views and commitment to our beliefs.  We can think that we are right and they are wrong, and at the same time, genuinely respect each other, and be confident in ourselves, even if others disagree with us.